How Do You Heal from Pet Loss?

Chocolate point Siamese

 

Here it is November 2025 and this is the first post since December of 2024 update. Oh, I have added to this website, but have reluctantly not been able to address having lost Lily on May 8, 2025. She was only 2 months past her 5th birthday. Far too young to die of kidney failure.

 

Upon research there is no real answer as to why. But things happened that probably contributed to it.

 

Both Lily and Lucy had vaccines of rabies and FVRCP in November of 2023. They were scheduled to have their teeth cleaned in December. To have the procedure done they were required to have blood work done. The blood draw showed that Lily had stage 1 and Lucy had stage 2 kidney failure.

 

FVRCP vaccine is made with cat kidney cells. So did these shots make their immune system go AWOL? Perhaps it compromised it. The other possibilities that was brought up with the research. A bad batch of vaccine, maybe the vaccine wasn’t handle properly. And of course that could have happened from the manufacturer, transporting, and even at the vet’s office.

 

Was that vaccine enough to push Lily to the point of no return? From the day I brought her home (at 9 months) in December 2020, she always drank lots of water.

 

Lucy was lethargic for about 4 months and managed to bounce back. Problem with this is that I felt if I could bring my stage 1 cat back to normal, then there would be hope for Lucy. So I did all the stuff they told me to do. Put her on a kidney diet. Constant blood draws. Internal med doctor and heart specialist. And she only got worse. During the year of 2024 we were dealing with many personal expenses that our insurance was not paying and coupled with the extensive vet costs, there wasn’t much left to follow Lucy’s. In 2025 they prescribed antibiotics for the white blood cell and iron for the red blood cell counts. It was always a hit and miss. Appetite stimulant was also prescribed when she wouldn’t eat. Each blood draw there would be an improvement on a few results and others would be worse. Never consistent. It was impossible to draw any conclusions of what should be adjusted.

 

When I took them both in for blood work in April of 2025 we found that Lucy no longer had kidney failure. But she had lost weight and muscle. You don’t notice the weight loss when you are with them day in and day out. Lily’s weight loss was noticeable though.

 

In May they wanted me to euthanize Lily. With the explanation she was starving… good grief she had been starving for months. I could not do that to her. The day I put her in the carrier, she cried and clawed to get out. She never reacted that way before. That image would have haunted me forever. I took her home and was with her most of the 50 hours she lived. Lucy was there and it helped her to have closure, as she was there when Lily was clawing the carrier, normally she disappears.

 

I find it all so senseless on the fact I only got the shots for them as if I might want to board them. I have not. The guilt lies within my mind. I could accept the fact if she had come down with kidney failure, but the cure was not obtainable.

 

I learned a lot in my research, but unfortunately too late during the final days of her illness. You can cut phosphorus in their diet without using kidney diet. There are other companies that sell low phosphorus canned cat food.

 

In the prescription kidney diet they use “soy”. Cats don’t get any value from soy. Case in point. Lucy was pulling her fur out. Since she no longer needed to be on the kidney diet, I only fed her about one third of the diet until it was all gone, instead of tossing it or giving it away. 2 days after she was no longer eating the kidney diet, she quit pulling her fur out. So the big question.  What is in the kidney diet that is really not helpful? Maybe a lot of stuff besides the soy. Is this even a diet cats should be eating?

 

Also in my research I read that the FVRCP vaccine should be given to kittens and a booster at one year. But after that… maybe 20 years! I have indoor only cats and they really don’t need a rabies shot either.

 

During one of my many visits to the vet’s clinic, the PA told that they do have exempt pets that they board. So since Lucy had come down with kidney failure stage 2, she should be exempt if I ever need to leave her with them. So the update on Lucy’s teeth. She doesn’t have any left that need to be cleaned. They have fallen out or reabsorbed which I am sure partly due to the kidney diet and maybe just the inherited trait of some Siamese. Her mouth doesn’t bother her so I am thankful.

 

Lucy loves being an only cat. Lily used to hide in the tunnel and go flying out at her when she passed by it. Now she has taken over the tunnel. No more hissing or swatting, even though they got along most of the time. Lucy has become my shadow. She also talks more, which cracks us up.

 

When I created this website I was going through a short term with no cats. A leap of faith to get two to make the name Two Felines happen. What I had not counted on was that one would be gone so soon. I guess that was a mistake on the naming. For now the name will remain in remembrance of the missing feline, Lily.

 

Here are a few sites I found helpful:

What is CKD?

Kidney Failure in Cats

Related Posts:

FVRCP Vaccine in Cats: How Much Is Enough?

Kidney Failure in Cats: Diet, Muscle Loss, and the Soy Question

Hope in Early-Stage Kidney Disease: Rethinking “Irreversible” in Cats

Teeth, Kidneys, and Timing: When Feline Health Becomes a Catch-22

 

 

 

 

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